Holiday Edition Part 1


“We are here to fully introduce ourselves, to impose ourselves and ideas and thoughts and dreams onto the world, leaving it changed forever by who we are and what we bring forth from our depths.” - Glennon Doyle, Untamed

Happy Eid al Fitr to our brothers and sisters.

Reading Untamed to prepare for my book club this June 5th. I’m primarily in charge of the discussion questions and am the de facto facilitator. I initially thought I couldn’t relate much to... well, mid-life issues from a white woman living a life of privilege in the USA — but yes I can. All women are sisters in a way. I am rooting for every one of us. When one has a breakthrough, I feel as if it is partly my own breakthrough. A cause for celebration.

I got to thinking about how women’s lives vary greatly. The traditional life of being a wife and mother. Celebrated for being married, for bringing life into this world. I have been fascinated by mom influencer Joy Mendoza for this life that she leads and which she is sharing online. Homeschooling six kids! I am obsessed. Her life is so different from mine. It’s what most moms want for their daughters and I probably will never get into a similar groove. So it’s just nice to learn about what I’m missing and have an appreciation for it.

Then there are also queer influencers like Mari Jasmine (?) who have around the same number of Joy’s followers online, like 70,000. Well, fact-check it, I might be confusing someone else for her tbh. I love the diversity of it all and the fact that one can’t assume that those followers are split into Team Conservative and Team LGBTQIA. They could be the same people who simply enjoy appreciating both kinds of lives. Am thrilled by that prospect because it means Filipinas are getting more progressive and getting wider perspectives about how a life can be lived.

I have Glennoned (get it?) relatively early and am forever grateful for the bravery I managed to muster then. Back then, I felt like I have pulled a sword from a stone and I have stumbled onto the Truth. There was no turning back. The bravery became muscle memory and I get to be brave every day since then. Glennoning appears to be a gateway to unlocking parts of one’s authentic self. It’s an everyday journey and it gets to be an easier climb; the biggest boulder was out of the way.

That quote at the top of this essay reminded me why I set up Skip The Rulebook. Don’t live your days living out someone else’s life, as Steve Jobs said. Skip the formula. Though I’ve always maintained that it’s useful to browse other lives to get ideas and form opinions. You can’t be what you can’t see. It’s easier to be free when there are people around you being set free. I’m passing it on to you.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Digitalholics Anonymous

Image
  Image from Apple Once upon a time, a friend of mine, let’s call her Rachel, felt miserable because she got realized that she got sucked back into being hooked on social media for the past few days. She had been on a social media break for months. It felt liberating not feeling that strange and persistent impulse to reach for her phone and mindlessly scroll. It felt like she got a God-given time refund of a couple of free hours each day. It was peaceful. It was peak contentment.  Then she had her last day with her company, and, feeling a little sad she couldn’t say goodbye to her work friends in person, decided to add them on social media so that they could maybe keep a digital connection alive while they wait out delta before having drinks in person. She posted a picture to commemorate her last day too, her first post in almost a year. It had likes. Interesting. The feeling of wanting to check likes came back. People kept adding her. Pretty soon she found herself reaching fo...
Read more

Headspace and the Cutest Thing

Image
Image from Headspace In the middle of mentally trying to survive the pandemic, a couple of big, probably lasting, realizations occurred: (a) kindness to yourself is a real thing to be done every day; and (b) “setting your intention” can be as straightforward as “still being okay at the end of the day”. Kindness to self was previously an alien subject to me. And silly. Why does one have to be intentional about being kind to yourself? It sounded like pure fluff and something that’s already automatic anyway, didn’t Nietzsche or somebody say that we are subconsciously acting out of self-interest underneath it all? What does this even mean, in practice? After months and months of being bombarded with the subject on Headspace, I realized that this means being self-aware enough to intentionally take care of yourself like how you would take care of a beloved parent, friend, partner. Making decisions about myself as if I’m another person I care about. Take a nap when I’m tired, not push myself ...
Read more

Tweets and Heavyweights

Image
Hello! Haven’t gotten to write for the past two weeks because of a couple of major things to attend to which have been throwing my daily/weekly routines off-center. This is not even the weekend, yet here is an essay. It’s been a couple of months since I got my iPad Air 4, Apple Pencil 2, and Smart Keyboard Folio set-up. The verdict: best tech set-up ever. I now understand why so many software engineers/tech people declared the 11-inch Macbook Air “best computer ever” when it came out. It’s like a small laptop, but you can rip out the keyboard easily and it’s a tablet. So portable, so nice to type on, a true companion for your thoughts and daily personal operations. Like how Steve Jobs originally wanted to name Apple “Bicycle” instead because he envisioned the computer to be a bicycle for the mind. Easy to bring everywhere because of the 10.9 inch size and light weight. It’s been indispensable. Currently geeking out over putting together my home office. I’ll share when it’s ready. Inves...
Read more