Simple and Sinister: Sustainable Strength

All you need for a home gym

For general health, doctors tell us that one needs: (a) 30 minutes of cardio at least 5 times a week and (b) 2 to 3 times of strength training in a week. I wanted to establish a mindless, frictionless routine of getting the requisite cardio and strength sessions done in a week. My fitness goal will always and forever just be general health - no “gains” targets, no gimmicks, no fitness cults (though I would love to go back to group workouts with friends just for fun, like spinning and Lagree, when the circumstances allow).

The 30-minute cardio requirement is a no-brainer thanks to my Apple watch (my best exercise motivator!). I just run for exactly 30 minutes when I wake up in the morning. Another thing already in my system is that most afternoons, I take a yoga class from my favorite yoga teacher which helps with stress and anxiety and physical symmetry.

The challenge for me is getting a consistent strength training regimen in. I think it’s essential in longevity and aging well. I’m confused as to what I should follow and most resources out there are scattered and don’t take strength progression into account. Pre-covid, I have been doing functional strength training for around 10 years off and on with different gyms, but apparently, that background is not enough to let me go at it on my own without somebody telling me what to do. There is a science to structuring a strength-based workout and I can’t be bothered to design a different workout every session. I want to minimize morning decisions so I can reserve my peak decision-making for other things like my job. Learned that from a Time feature on Obama. He keeps his choice of wardrobe in the morning to either blue or black suits to minimize decision-making because the number of quality decisions you can make in a day is finite, supposedly.

After a couple of weeks of research and experimenting, I’ve settled on the Simple and Sinister kettlebell workout by Pavel Tsatsouline. The book can be read in a one sitting. It hits all my strength workout targets: (a) insanely simple - just TWO exercises daily, forever; (b) it has an easy system for strength progression; (c) it has recommended weights for women; and (d) it’s a max of 25 minutes a day. It’s a no brainer exercise routine that works out the entire body and scientifically makes you stronger even in exercises that aren’t part of the workout, like in dips and pull-ups.

The reviews are all positively stellar. There’s a lot of noise and fancy other workouts from a lot of sources on the web. Well, I think a lot of them is just for purposes of revenue generation for the fitness industry which is all well and good for them, but I can’t be bothered. 

I highly recommend that you read the book and look into the routine (Reddit has a good summary), again, a grand total of TWO exercises, plus warm-up and cool down:

1. One-arm kettlebell swings (10x10) - Form is absolutely crucial here or else you’ll be injured. If you’re doing this for the first time, I suggest you start with two-arm swings and get a friend to check if your form is correct. I started out with swings before with a coach.

2. Turkish get-ups (10 total) - again, form!

The book explains the science behind it, but I understand the combination of these two exercises are explosive and slow whole-body movements, which is what our bodies need to build strength.

No, this won’t cause you to bulk up like a man [rolls eyes], that all depends on your diet. For women, Pavel recommends getting 3 kettlebells for now: 8kg, 12kg, and 16kg. You’ll start at 8kg for both swings and get-ups. The simple goal is to get to swing 20kg and get-up at 16kg, through step progressions. Right now I’m at a 12kg swing and 8kg get-up, and I’m in no hurry. Again, my goal is longevity and general health. This ticks the boxes for me in the most efficient way.

Will be keeping at this for the time being. If I find a better routine, I’ll write about it — though I expect it would be hard to find something to top this one.